Short guide to safer sex

Unfortunately, the days of completely carefree sex are no longer with us. In today’s world, part of being a superb lover means taking responsibility for protecting yourself and your partner from diseases that can be incurable or even fatal.

So talk frankly with each other about any risky behaviors in your past, get tested for HIV, and use latex condoms and barriers until you’re 100 percent sure of each other’s sexual health and commitment to responsible sex. Remember, you can be infected with AIDS and many other serious diseases through oral sex and sex toys as well as through anal or vaginal intercourse. And even with condoms, sex that involves body fluids is not completely safe, just safer. Here are some basic guidelines.

Use only latex condoms and barriers—viruses can pass through rubber and lambskin but not through latex.
Never use a condom more than once.
Always have him wear a condom for vaginal or anal penetration and for receiving oral sex.
To prevent vaginal infections, never allow him to move directly from anus to vagina.
Wear a dental dam when receiving oral sex from him.
Use latex gloves for finger penetration.
Wash sex toys in hot soapy water after each use, and apply condoms to them for playing.
Use only water based Lubricants with latex — oil or petroleum-based fluids destroy latex.
Know that the spermicide nonoxynol-9 offers some extra protection from germs but practically no protection from viruses — always use condoms in addition.

If you apply the condom, it can become an erotic and fun part of your loveplay. There are also a wide variety of ribbed or flavored condoms that actually enhance sensation. I know it’s not ideal, but it is necessary. So be smart. Be firm. Be sure. Then go ahead and drive each other wild in bed. Making love with a man you feel comfortable and safe with is the greatest aphrodisiac of all.

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